I saw your email at a kegger in the Gamma Quadrant

I’ve just read a fascinating, fascinating, fascinating email marketing study by Brightwave founder G. Simms Jenkins. Like many folks, Jenkins receives dozens of bulk commercial emails from all types of businesses, every single day. As an experiment, however, he actually answered them just to see what would happen next.

What could happen to these emails? Would […]

I’ve just read a fascinating, fascinating, fascinating email marketing study by Brightwave founder G. Simms Jenkins. Like many folks, Jenkins receives dozens of bulk commercial emails from all types of businesses, every single day. As an experiment, however, he actually answered them just to see what would happen next.

What could happen to these emails? Would a human being respond back? Would Jenkins get flooded with autoresponders? Would his reply get sucked into a black hole of terrible nothingness in the far, cold reaches of outer space? Well, yes, yes, and uh, yes, unfortunately.

Only a handful of companies actually responded to his inquiries with an email from a real person.

The rest? Well, I think it’s safe to assume that keeping the customer contact chain intact was just not a priority. Not only did a bunch of emails bounce back to Jenkins’ account, undelivered, or disappear into nothingness, but the return addresses on many of the original bulk emails were noread@blahblahblah.com, nonhuman@blahblahblah.com, etc.

So just imagine, as Jenkins says, some of those emails he sent were unsubscribe requests? If they’re going nowhere, what’s stopping him (or any other customer in a similar situation) from hitting the abuse button? Absolutely nothing. Interesting stuff.

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